This seriously does not sound like very healthy relationship behaviour on either of your parts. "She's hurting you and you want her more"? "she's flirting like crazy"? I believe that the love we attract into our life is a reflection of the love we feel for ourselves. I don't think that an effective way of dealing with NRE is to allow yourself to be treated badly. Allowing someone space and allowing them to treat you badly are two very different things
I can see why you'd say that. I think I probably articulated myself poorly. Just 2 weeks ago we were meeting with a Planner working on retirement, and now I can't even look two weeks out. I think I'm wanting/needed her more because I'm so scared of losing her. I really cant picture a life without her. Sort of happy might be better than never happy again. On her side, I think she's flirting more as a way to show me she still loves me and finds me attractive.
Last night was her first date free night since Sunday, she was sad. She said it's because she feels like everything is falling apart, she wants two relationships, and feels completely alone, like she has two half-relationships. I held her and comforted her as best I could until she went to bed, and I retired to the spare room. She also had somemore drama yesterday, she came out to her boss, who is a very dear friend of both of ours the day before. Her boss was very encouraging to her; but has also been a bit hard on her at work. As I said we're also friends, I called her to make sure she was ok, and understood I was going to be ok. Her boss just burst into tears and couldn't even speak. I told her I loved her, I'll be ok, and to please just try to support my mrs. as much as she could.