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Old 07-06-2010, 07:47 AM
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MrRusty MrRusty is offline
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Join Date: May 2010
Location: Yorkshire and Kent
Posts: 42
Unhappy

Quote:
Originally Posted by jokutus View Post

he was in a loveless marriage with 2 kids and was just looking for a casual hookup!!! The underlying message - He was attempting to cheat on his wife under the guise of being poly!!! Arg, how frustrating!!

***---- End Rant ---***
Well, at least you admit you are ranting.

I'm afraid my OKC profile used to be pretty much one of those. I've been suppressing what I think are poly inclinations for 30+ years now, and the only way I could think of to relieve the stress of that was to look for an illicit patrner. Okay, I am self-aware enough to realise I am 'not just looking for quick shag' as I believe I put it; maybe others miss this point.

Look, in many social spheres there is no possibility of anything as beautiful as poly - having another s.o. automatically means rejecting the original one. Maybe he was just looking for a casual hookup, I'm not saying you misread it, but also maybe he too was struggling to understand himself.

It's hard in this mindset to reconcile a wanted partner with desires for other relationships. Maybe his marriage felt 'loveless' because - like me - he felt he didn't love her properly because he did not feel exclusive.

It's only because I was lucky enough to hook up with a woman who is so damn smart she has worked out many of the poly principles all on her own that I didn't end up cheating myself.

So cut us repressed & confused polys a little slack there, if you please.
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