thanks for posting, I don't blame you for loving more than one, but you need to get a hold of that. You are not the only one who has been in love and it isn't the end of the world. I really think you need to take the emotion out of the situation and think about it with a clear mind.
I know, I know, that is hard and you are in love.... I get that I have been there. But you need to! bottom line is that you need to back up and take a breath.
I really strongly recommended that you don't go to this guy, but he come to you. He needs to know and so do you that you are dealing with three of you! Not two. You should never of done the don't ask don't tell thing in my opinion and should of all got together before going any further...
Now you have gone a different route that is more difficult but not the end of the world... it would of been easier the other way. But...
now I would suggest getting the men together, let them get to know each other and see where that goes. Your husband is going to have a very hard time now with this as you have been touched by another man... he felt very strongly about that and you have broken a sacred bond for him. It needs patching and healing for a long time before he will be able to be fine with your sleeping with this man again... or you possibly!
of course this is all my opinion, but for what it's worth, I have a lot of experience in fucking up and there is a lot I would change to get where I am today.
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Last edited by redpepper; 07-06-2010 at 06:43 AM.