Originally Posted by JRiverMartin
But that would be insufficient evidence that he loves you less. He'd have to provide better evidence, as in the form of some real and concrete abuse or neglect, some truly unloving behavior. Exclusivity is no proof of love: only loving behaviour is proof of love.
I cringe as I read this because I know that in my jealousy I have behaved less than lovingly towards him at times. He cited me for it the other day, used the word "abusive" and that was my deciding factor in taking a break from our relationship.
I feel this guilt inside that maybe my love for him is false - if I truly loved him, how could I possibly hurt him?? But then again, it has also been part of my upbringing/culture to react to pain by causing pain. It is difficult to shrug off these beliefs. As you describe above, these kinds of things are false!
It's like transforming my entire value system! And I'm gonna do it, because the current one is f**ked.