Originally Posted by Derbylicious
This is just here because I'm not sure where else to post it. I had a dream last night where I was with a group of people and I wanted to do something (can't remember what exactly) and someone in the group (which was a person who I had seen irl earlier in the day but don't really know) said to me "shouldn't you be asking your owner permission first?" (referring to redpepper) I couldn't stick around in the group after that, my feeling is that I'm my own person and no one owns me. I think that's my biggest fear of becoming involved with bdsm at all is that I will somehow become the property of someone else.
I just wanted to get that out since it's been on my mind this morning. Thanks!
Thats a great dream, and in such detail.
You have the right to whatever you want in your own bdsm listing. Just make hard rules like "I don't not want to be referred to as property and am not owned by anyone"...some people like that, and some don't. Don't only come up with or explore your potential fetishes, find things you don't like and list them.
Create your own bdsm checklist and hold it to truth. Be as flexible as YOU want to be. I may eventually sub for someone, but I have the same hang up. For the longest time, when I discussed personal submission, it was only ever a physical contest for me. I would only submit if someone could actually force me to. While I have never submitted to someone, this has been modified quite a bit to be more inclusive.
Some people live the lifestyle, some people live the lifestyle in the bedroom and others play.