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Old 07-05-2010, 02:53 PM
inlovewith2 inlovewith2 is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 117

Originally Posted by SayYes View Post
I told myself I was "willing" to make the sacrifice, but sometimes "willingness" to sacrifice something is not enough to mediate the damage that sacrifice does to you and your relationship.
This quote is very salient for me. It is my biggest fear--I've sacrificed a lot for our relationship, not because he asked me to, but because I *chose* to, but it did damage for sure. What damage would this do?

You *can* make it work with one of you poly and the other mono. My husband isn't entirely sure yet where he falls on that spectrum, but he knows that I will remain poly no matter what he ultimately decides is right for him with regard to other relationships. At some point, I think it becomes a question not so much of whether you're *willing* to live monogamously, but whether you really *can* have a relationship that is healthy for you under those circumstances.
You lay it out very nicely. This is at the heart of it, isn't it?

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