Definition of pathology
I tend to think of pathology as definition 1, not 2. So it took a bit to wrap my mind around your post. I come at this as a credentialed allied health professional. (not clinical, just paperwork.)
1. the branch of medical science that studies the causes and nature and effects of diseases
2. any deviation from a healthy or normal condition
Realize that many laymen diagnose, when medical types define. And it is easy to assume someone is judging, when they are simply labeling.
When experiencing something new, whether a new food or a new idea, we tend to judge it, based on our experience. Some people with negative experiences in cheating or jealousy, will reject this life outright. Maybe they are thinking, "This isn't for me."
Give them time to get used to the idea... Be a good person, and let them absorb and learn more. Give them time. Polyamory is an acquired taste. Sometimes we forget to be gentle with others. -- and they forget to be gentle with us.
The classic example is people who consider homosexuality either sinful or an "abomination." Homosexuality is NOT a psychiatric diagnosis in the DSM-IV. In another 20 years, we'll have gay marriage, and socially, it will be accepted. In part, that is due to research that homosexuality is in part "hard wired."
Understand that I don't view judgment as a bad thing. Daily we make judgments... What is the best food for breakfast, the best route to work, the best outfit to wear. We judge others... "she shouldn't wear that color," "he shouldn't talk about that in a public place," etc.
Is poly a psych diagnosis? No. Do various polys have psych diagnoses? Yes. Can you convince the world to stop judging? No. Can you convince yourself that their judgment doesn't matter? Maybe.
Can they point and giggle? Spread mis-information? Make your life difficult? Yes.
You can't change what they do or think. You can change how you react.