Wow,..do I ever understand where you are at, and what you feel, and even why you do the things you do,.... It sounds similiar to my first marriage.
I really wish I knew what to tell you, what path to set you on, what helpful advice to give.
I can`t, because it goes different ways for different people. Sometimes these situations, end up being the wake up call for a relationship (hitting rock bottom),..and other times it means the end of a relationship,....
It all depends on the reasons you came together.
I hope some people here can give you good advice. Be well.
( triplets ? wow ! thats very cool !)