I am very open to many about my background. In responce to this I say it varies. I was molested as a child and went through a rough time. I remember wanting to be hugged and held and being afraid of it too. It has affected me a lot in relationships. I say this because I know I am not the only one. I think for me a poly relationship has translated into safety for me. If I do not want to be touched I have my own room and can go there and not be touched or intimate for long periods of time. Other times however I will want this and my partners for the most part understand. Sex is another thing I struggle with. THere are certain things that I will not do at all. I also like that we have a word that indicates I need to stop. I consider this "special needs" like others have hearing issues or crutches. The poly lifestyle has given me the space and the sanctuary to explore and to heal safely. I am trusting more each day and hopefully in time I will have a better view of myself and those things like touch and sex.