Originally Posted by chefett
thank you. I do feel that he has betrayed me with this woman but not in a sexual way. I know that he loves me and I too am very much in love with him and I think some people are just born poly kinda like some people are born gay and i just happened to fall in love with a poly person. I dont want to share a room because I still can't wrap my mind around the fact that he's going to be out doing things with other women/woman and come climb into bed with me. Do I take on a roll of the non-sex partner? is that still poly? How do I sort out my feelings? Am I wrong in trying to do this for my boyfriend ? Are my rules just my way of not letting this happen ? because he says he wont do it if we have to sleep apart and not make love to each other. Also while he's out with whoever he chooses what am I to do ? Sit at home and Clean? I'm so confused.
I know the idea of being a non-sexual partner. I have offered it many times because I felt I could better support Redpepper's freedom in that capacity. Like your boyfriend she does not want this. What is or isn't poly is not the issue (that debate is endless lol!) Perhaps your rules are just to put up impossible blocks which again is not a sign of healthy acceptance. Anyone can suffer through this, but you want to be healthy in it first and foremost. What do you do? Maybe explore starting up your own additional relationship or maybe use the time to do something else you want to. How does your boyfriend feel about you exploring others sexually? How do you feel about it?