Originally Posted by Propast
S comes home from a weekend trip with D. I let her know what I've got cooking. She's furious. End of good feelings. I'll skip the major jealousy, fights, the 2-month road back to health and an even keel. Long story short, this makes S realize that she really can't share me with anyone.
Call me a hardass on this sort of thing, if you will. My response to such is simple and direct: Oh, hell, no! Homey don't play those games. Anybody wants to try that sort of disrespectful shit on me is gone in short order.
If somebody chooses to be mono in a poly tangle, that's cool. Nobody gets to decide that for anybody besides him- or herself, however, and to even attempt it is a sign of gross disrespect for the other person.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.