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Old 06-24-2010, 06:53 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,723

Originally Posted by ellie View Post
We've been together about a year and a half (sorry for not including that in) and he's been seeing his secondary for about 3 months (this is the first girl outside our relationship and I've been with one other about 8 months ago). I just started leaving stuff there when I had major surgery in February. We've moved really slow and built a relationship. His secondary asked to leave a toothbrush a month in and we both thought it best not too.

It's along story, and I've posted before, but we are taking a break for a few weeks I think so I can sort out my issues with the secondary. One of my main issues is she doesn't know we were/are in an open relationship. He's told her he sleeps with other people but that's it. She prefers the other women he's with to be nebulous.

I know alot about her from what he's told me and from what I've found out through facebook or her online dating profile. I know she wants a mono relationship. He doesn't like the fact that I know everything about her. He doesn't want me to meet her, contact her etc.

We fought this weekend about it and he packed up all my stuff and told me to leave. The next day we talked over instant messenger and he said maybe we just need a few weeks break.

I just don't know...oh and we are 27 and I'm 32, his secondary is 29
I can see why you would have issues. He is cheating on her. I would be very upset about that.

I think you have just been dumped. I can't see any other reason why he would not want her to know about you and then kick you out. He wants her in a mono relationship it sounds like and you have been jeopardizing that with your annoying emotions and frustrated demands that he fess up...

I think I'd move on. He's done by the sounds of it.

It might be helpful to drop by and tell him that when she is around. Might as well spare her the drama and harm of being similarly dumped or cheated on. You could at least rest easy that she knows what he has been doing.
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