Thank you everyone for your thoughts so far. It is so wonderful to find this forum!!!
Irena, I will most definitely be using your list as a sort of guide for me to work through things.
What stuck out for me was your commentary on emotional security. This is an area that I know I need to work through more with my current partner. He is absolutely wonderful, but given that I had a long term relationship that was abusive in many ways it will take time for me to really trust anyone fully. This is one reason why I am hesitant to bring someone in (in the sexual realm, the reality is that emotionally I already love this girl very deeply) as I know that I have enough baggage I have to work through before I open myself up further.
It is difficult though, because my desire to express myself with this woman verbally and physically is very strong, and I feel conflicted about suppressing it until I have everything else in order.
Thank you for your positive encouragement. I am very lucky to finally be in a place where I feel safe enough to even explore this possibility.