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Old 06-13-2010, 09:32 PM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
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Well I figured if I said "I" and "me" that would indicate I was talking about myself.... I figured I would ruffle feathers by having a differing opinion for myself. *shrug* what I know about myself is hard earned and my experience only. I don't tell my story to convince or in anyway passive aggressively send a message. I tell it because it is mine, different or not. Its mine and I can only go by that.

I have had a few long distance romances that didn't work for me. We would tend to turn our connection into a fantasy and that became evident when we got together. Everyday life just wasn't the same and it became awkward. I didn't like it and would of preferred to of kept my distance in order to maintain the fantasy. One time I didn't meet the person until later and a couple of other times was because of them or me moving away.

As to nerdist and our plan to go away that never happened... We talked about it in the fall, we got distracted, roly came along, priorities changed and that's that. Its just how it is. Priorities change. There is no other thought to that. We can make other plans, but the fact of the matter is that things have changed. Its the nature of the thing and I am going with it.

There is no reason to be alarmed at my mentioning that we weren't able to go away. Everyone that enters our lives creates change and we do in theirs. They are an addition to our lives, not a replacement or a disruption, an addition. I trust nerdist and have no reason to interfer in what he does. I know what my worth is to him and know he isn't looking to replace me and our time. He has an addition in you roly and I welcome that. All will be revealed about what that means. It has revealed a difference already. There is no stopping that. We all make differences in each others lives. The point is to let it go without any judgment attached as to what it means. Let it go and wait. My time to go away with him will come, but it needs to be understood that in going away with me, he won't be coming to you. Just as in his going away to be with you means he won't be going away with me. It evens out eventually. Its just how it is. If you were here it would be the same thing. It already has been. Just in little bits. It has effected me and him that you are in his life and therefore mine. Of course it would. The notion of him going away every now and then is going to be an adjustment. One that I will work on in time.

Hope this makes sense.
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