,..Firstly,... Rolypoly,..I must say I am very impressed with your writings in this thread. You sound like someone who has a very clear view of themself, and has not forgot the people around you. I hope you get everything you wish for.
Ariakas : Good points. We all need to be very careful of the slippery slope of belittling. It can unintentionally lead to dismissing others wants and wishes, simply because they are not our own wishes.
Poly is such a complicated thing some days, and it can be hard to know when we are doing such things with our words or how we phrase things. I know I can be guilty of being blunt and sounding dismissive, when really I am airing out my 'usual' feelings on a subject. Those feelings easily change when I see the evidence in front of me.
As for the actual subject, LDR works for some, and not for others. That part is obvious.
Honestly though, I think the biggest factor is the people themselves.
It`s the combination of the personalities, and how they relate, that matters most. We all know the feeling, of finding ourselves doing things we never thought was possible within ourselves, ...all for love.
It`s part of that pain in the arse thing called ' Growth'.
If it`s a good decision, it feels like the right thing to do, and we do it happily. So that we have that person in our life, in some way. If it`s the wrong thing to do, then resentment builds up, and it never feels right.