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Old 06-10-2010, 05:49 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,435

Originally Posted by weareone View Post
He cheated on me it was awful. [...] The man I love is basically a lying cheater and I've always been encouraging him to tell the truth to the other women about how he feels about me but he is so much a people pleaser so much afraid of getting into arguements etc.
Hmm, a trend?

My most current lover is great. He likes the idea of poly but wants to be with me when I am with the other man, otherwise he says it could be cheating. I don't want to mix my men or even have them meet each other. So I feel a bit lost, isolated and confused. I have never had 3somes or group sex and am not interested at this time in those activities. I want to explore poly but am not sure how to go about it. Any advise would be appreciated. thanks for reading.
A popular definition of cheating is: having sex outside your relationship which your partner does not consent to. In this case, he is not consenting to you having sex with other guys if it doesn't involve him. So in my opinion, under those circumstances, it would be cheating if you did it anyway, knowing that he does not approve.

As for not wanting your men to meet each other, I have to ask: Why? What are you afraid of? If your boyfriends go out for a beer and become close friends, wouldn't that be a good thing? That's like, the holy grail of poly: two partners who get along and don't fight over you or mind sharing
As I am sure any cat owner will be able to tell you,
someone else putting you in a box is entirely different
from getting into a box yourself.
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