Originally Posted by Derbylicious
If it wasn't for the friendshop between the kids and the heartache that it is causing my son I could just let it be. The kids complicate things. I've pretty much let go of things for my own sake and I'm branching out to other friends and other support systems. I'm a grownup and I (kind of) get it, the kids don't though, all they know is that an almost sibling is gone for no real reason.
Sometimes, friends move away. It's sad for a while, but kids seem to get over it. If they're in school, they probably have lots of friends from there. You could ask them if there are any friends from school that they really like and would like to invite over for dinner or a sleepover.
You also don't need to be friends with the mom for the kids to be friends. If she's all crazy about Mr. NewGuy, you could offer to take her kids for sleepovers. Then your kids still get to hang out with their friends, and she doesn't have to give up her "special time."
When it comes to kids, I like to consider what kind of influence people are having. Sure, your kids are all friends -- but she's sending the message that it's OK for people to bail on commitments, even if it hurts people. Might be better in the long run to cut ties like that.