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Old 06-08-2010, 12:20 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,633
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thanks jkelly, food for thought!

I would add to my list,

-your #5, let your and others relationships be as they are. I think it is important to realize that my relationship with someone is going to be different than someone elses and therefore I am valuable because of that difference as much as I am in my sameness. I will find my own way in my relationships with someone, but "heads up" are sometimes appreciated. Some times I tell Nerdist how things might work better in his relationships too. That kind of info can be really be helpful in determining success in a new relationship.

-your #9, I agree, community is so important... even just on here! There have been times when I have relied entirely on the community on this forum to help me get through. There is nothing wrong with that, but actual tangible people in front of your face is very helpful... experiencing what goes on in their lives as it happens and being a part of that is a huge learning experience.

I would like to suggest jkelly that the result of your #4, of rules are "often counter-productive"... and "that it's probably best to just avoid them..." could be because of your #9, in that you don't have anything in common with poly-fi folk... rules and discussion of boundaries seem to be big deal to this population because of primary relationships and family issues. Just a thought.
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