Lying to myself
This weekend my partner, who I was engaged to marry, has gone off to be with a woman from his past. They have been texting and sending each other photos of their genitals and he spends every minute at work texting her.
I knew they were texting, but not the extent of it. He has talked to me about being non-monogamous and over time I have intellectually seen how interesting and possibly wonderful poly could be. We decided that he would go and spend the weekend with her.
After less than 24 hours I am finding myself very sad, frightened and angry that I agreed to this. He has not called me, as he said he would, and he is not answering texts or emails.
I feel that I need to end our relationship because I feel so stressed and that this would basically be the way it will be for the rest of my life if we got married. I guess some people are just not right for poly. It makes me so sad because I am very much in love with him