It sounds like her point of view is that you are wrecking her good time with "unloading" your feelings onto her. In my opinion that is just too darn bad. No one ever has their cake and eats it too. At least very rarely in a poly situation. You know why? Because we have a responsibility to our other partners to listen and deal with their "unloading." Its part of the whole thing. If she thinks she can get away with not having to do so, she is sadly mistaken. If she wants you as her number one so badly then I think she is going to just have to be strong and deal. In this case she can't have it all without work. Work that most of us have to put in so we can live this way.
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