Thread: Are we doomed?
View Single Post
Old 06-04-2010, 07:53 PM
inlovewith2 inlovewith2 is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 117

Now he has started actively looking for another girl.
This is a bit of a flag for me. I'm still working on composing my own post about my experience with this; but suffice it to say that my exploration into polyamory has expanded much faster than anticipated, which has presented challenges. If you aren't comfortable with him looking for someone else, I encourage you to tell him!!! While it may seem obvious, he may be caught up and not seeing the big picture.

So, short answer, I do feel like I am alone in this.
Feeling alone is awful. I'm glad you found this forum, but again, expressing that to your guy is very important.

I just want a relationship where I love someone who loves me and I feel secure, like I belong, like I really matter and am special. I need a relationship where we can learn from each other and grow and experience new things together. Is that so diametrically opposed to this type of relationship?
Well, some of that list is up to you (feeling insecure is a major issue for me, so I can relate), but no, I do not think that a poly relationship is in any way mutually exclusive with what you describe. I'm new at this (4 months), but I absolutely believe that the relationship you describe is possible whether monogamous or polyamorous (or I wouldn't be here ;-)). I've already experienced these elements in my non-primary relationships.

Best wishes,

Reply With Quote