Well I'll admit I'm new to this whole polyamory thing. I do know a bit about it. When my husband first brought the subject up I did do some research on it. I'm not sure whether you read my introduction or not, but it explains more there. I understand the difference between swinging and poly. I do have a friend that grew up in as a child in a poly lifestyle and him and his girlfriend continue that too. They have a girl friend that they share and it works for them. This is really the only real life experience I have of a poly lifestyle.
As I said I am not bi, so there is a lot I don't understand. I guess I imagine it easier than not. Maybe that's based on my friend. I also know what my husband and I are looking for. I understand that what we want will probably be harder to find then not. I also know that our relationship is not ready for it, yet.
As far as the "advice" that I gave, that's all it is. Just an idea. For me, I think it would be easier to have someone that everyone invovled gets along even friends. I understand that not everyone can do that. I also understand where she is coming from about being bi. I'm on the other side of that. Like I said it was just a thought. I understand it sounds easier than it actually is. But I think any relationship, monogamous poly friendships family, requires work. There are going to be issues, jealousy, anger, fights. Its the matter of who has the communication skill to be able to keep those relationships and work on them.