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Old 05-31-2010, 06:20 PM
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Derbylicious Derbylicious is offline
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Join Date: May 2009
Location: Victoria BC
Posts: 1,603

Originally Posted by redpepper View Post

I guess people actually "tolerate" people in a poly constellation. I guess sometimes there is no choice but to "tolerate" if a person comes in who is invited by someone other than me and I am not the one making the choices to have them there. How does one deal with that?
Partly I think you try to get to know them and find the good qualities there (I'm not very good at this btw). The other thing is that you talk a lot to those who you do feel supported by and come to a place of acceptance of the person rather than tolerance. It doesn't mean that you ever have to like them though, just that what they chose to do has less effect on your emotions. There's a lot more I want to say on this but when I type it out it doesn't make a whole lot of sense.

Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not ok it's not the end.
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