I wrote this in another thread,
"I'm really impressed with how its been going for you so far. You are really being smart and respectful. Your consideration for all concerned and your self is to be commended. The time and patience you have been taking is great.
I think you have lots of time to work this out and let things fall into place. A lot of your concerns will be answered in time and the answers will become evident if you leave them to manifest into what should become.
After all, its all new and no doubt you have not only some NRE (new relationship energy) with him, but the whole situation and poly itself." http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2876
I think I am essentially saying it to you too. Nerdist and I talked this morning about everything that is going on for you and he asked that I write to you. I don't know if I should get too involved except to say that for me things are going just fine. The door is opened a crack and we are all looking inside to see what might be, that is entirely the right pace I think. We agree that there is potential for that door to open, but it should be left up to the future I think.... and patience.
Bottom line is for you to find a place where you can take care of your physical and mental health. The rest will follow. It's not like there will be an end if you move far away. It will just be different and take a different pace than if you lived here. Sure it would suck for the two of you, but it doesn't have to. There will be visits, emails, phone calls.... stuff you already are doing.
I'm not sure what the rush is to figure any of it out. There is the whole summer and when the time comes and winter is upon us, it might be more evident. Other than that the pace you are going and the exploration you are doing, as are we, is par for the course and a journey that we should all be enjoying as far as I am concerned.