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Old 05-31-2010, 06:30 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
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"people not dropping their ego and saying that it's someone else's problem... I wonder if cowboys/girls have this attitude to." I wrote this elsewhere, but it made me wonder if people who come into a poly relationship have this attitude.

Wow I'm feeling very naive all of a sudden.... I am so fortunate that this has not been my experience thus far. I pick people to be in my life that are not ego centric or prone to think its someone else's problem when feelings come up. Actually I did date a guy at the time I met Mono who's girlfriend was dating Nerdist and that was their attitude. It lasted a few days longer and then I ended it when I found his attitude to be as such. I guess I have experienced it at some level.

I guess people actually "tolerate" people in a poly constellation. I guess sometimes there is no choice but to "tolerate" if a person comes in who is invited by someone other than me and I am not the one making the choices to have them there. How does one deal with that?

Our community here is so small that I think we all "tolerate" each other to a certain extent. I was told that on the topic of age just recently. I put it out there that in other cities younger people, or those on a certain point of the spectrum of poly sometimes stick together and have a lack of patience for older poly people or those at another point in the spectrum (or visa versa) and was told that people in my community don't have anyone else but us and so we "tolerate" each other.

I guess that means that a cowboy/girl could also enter a community as well as a tribe. Or be that person that blasts the whole thing to shit by being the one who is ego centric and telling others that it's their problem if they don't agree. It makes me think of my own actions and where they have lead me in the past. How much I tolerate of those around me on a daily basis in life and for what reason.

It seems cowboys/girls can be anywhere or walk among us at anytime in life. I'm reminded of so many occasions of this in my life...Geez, I think I better go to bed and think about this more. Besides, sometimes people think I am talking about them when I'm not.... my mind just leads me places and I am constantly thinking thinking thinking.....
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