You have valid concerns about wanting to keep your private life safe.
I'm not surprised that she's looking for men in the same place she met you. People stick with what they know and with what works.
Good to hear that you've found a way that makes you both comfortable.
Would you be willing to share what compromise you found, to help others in a similar situation?
Gralson: my husband. Auto: my girlfriend.
Zoffee: Auto's husband. Cue: Zoffee's boyfriend. Bookie: Cue's wife.