View Single Post
  #9  
Old 05-21-2010, 07:07 AM
bittysue bittysue is offline
New Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 2
Smile Thank you

Your replies have been helpful and have pointed out some things to me which though I already knew needed to be worked on, had been pushed to the back of my mind.
Perhaps I'm in denial about being dependent or codependent, but I think my partner and I have a fairly healthy relationship without what most people consider the normal amount of conflict. In any case, he and I are always working together and separately to ensure that our relationship stays healthy and moving in a positive direction. (let me just say at this point that it amazes me that I found someone that not only wants to work on the relationship but often is the one to initiate hard conversations. That, I must admit is new to me)
He and I are still building the foundation of our relationship, the bedrock it is built upon is sturdy, so I am hopeful that if/when we meet someone that fits with us we will be able to take it in stride and not have too many negative feelings.
I know I had asked about 'avoiding' negative feelings, but really I think I should have asked about how to resolve them. I don't want to side step them or pretend I'm not having them, but I tend to have a hard time owning my feelings. Or feeling as if I have the right to feel the way I do. So dealing with them is often internalized and my poor guy has to pry out of me what my issue is because I'm not good at sharing. I have a hard time articulating myself in a way that is understandable and which accurately describes what is going on in my head. Shoot, sometimes I don't even know whats really going on or why I feel a certain way!
I suppose that is what I need to work on, the sharing part. I don't have any reason not to want to share and every reason to want to. I know that my partner isn't going to judge me or tell me what I'm feeling isn't valid. I just need to suck it up and open my mouth. lol

So, again thank you all for your words of wisdom, I do truly appreciate it as it did start me thinking in a way that was helpful for me to work out what exactly it was I was worried about. And that is usually have the problem!



And yes, I'm a fan of the run-on sentence! lol
Reply With Quote