My song... part 4
One day while over at our house I asked her about this thing she does called reiki. I didn't really know what it was but was curious and she set up an appointment with me. I went over and she asked me what kind of music I wanted to hear. I told her "Whatever, let your iPod play on random if you want because the universe speaks to me through music." The session was marvelous. Made me so high. This woman, who I will now refer to as goddess #2(g#2 for short), had the most incredible touch. I lfeft there that night in a state of bliss. I walked out to my truck, turned on the radio and said, "Ok Universe, what have you got to say to me now?" It was the tail end of a commercial and some talk and I laughed about that... but then... I should explain that my wife, goddess #1, is a MAJOR Beatles fan... and has turned me into one as well. That part of the story is a whole other amazing thing... but I'll skip it for now. Back to it... BUT THEN... after the commercial talk, the music started... "All You Need Is Love"... and I cried tears of joy as it played all the way back to my house. I walked in and told my wife... I was crying from sheer bliss.
I went back a couple of weeks later for reiki session #2 with g#2. It hit me, and I later found out hit her too, as soon as she opened up the door, a rush through my blood leaving. G#2 was so beautiful to me and our relationship was turning into something else. I had played her "Dear Prudence" on the mandolin one time as payment for the first reiki session and this time I sat on her reiki table and played her "You Are My Sunshine" on the guitar. She squatted on the floor looking up at me in total love and I could feel it. The whole reiki session I felt so uncomfortable with this somewhat instant change. I was nervous and feeling guilty. I hugged her goodbye and walked out of the house feeling like I had just cheated on my wife. I said to myself, "This is what those guys do.. those guys that go see their lovers and go home to their wives lying about it." I was really uncomfortable about it.
I knew I couldn't go back for anymore of those sessions. I tried to talk to my wife about it as best as I could. I explained to her that I couldn't go back. I explained to her how I was feeling about g#2... I explained a few more things I thought too... but apparently, I would later find out I wasn't that clear about it. Sometimes things have to be re-said because the intended audience isn't totally aware. When I told my wife she got a bit angry and felt like g#2 was just using me to get to her. I was really hurt and felt like maybe she was right.
I eventually talked to g#2 and told her how I felt and why I couldn't go back. It took me two weeks to actually talk to her. After the conversation with my wife I just wanted to go hide in a cave somewhere. Focus all of my attention on her. But my wife was also making a bigger commitment to this woman in a business sense as they came together in a partnership. Co-owners of a sort... not wanting to give a whole lot of details around that but... that's enough I think.
One day I ran into g#2 and she was with this other woman. I called my wife and mentioned that I ran into g#2 and that I thought she was out on a date. My wife denied it... "She isn't like that." "She wouldn't do that." "She HAS friends!" I kind of laughed but left it alone. I knew my wife was a bit jealous at the thought.
About a week later we were all hanging out... things had chilled a bit... and then g#2 mentioned that she had had sex with another woman. Again there's a dynamic I'm leaving out, but my wife was incensed and started making all these justifications about why it was wrong... g#2 was laughing a bit about it... somewhat surprised by my wife's reaction since she had basically accepted that my wife didn't have feelings for her anymore. I on the other hand thought it was so funny I had to walk into the other room so I wouldn't bust out laughing. But laugh I did while I was sitting in the other room.