Its just not possible to go our seperate ways at the moment. Its a finacial issue.
I tried the counselling approach , i asked him to seek counselling for his issues as I had done for mine. We tried relationship counselling so we could at the very least try to be friends but he didnt want to really engage with the process.
Im not expecting my relationship to be healthy because i am with someone else.
I just want to work out how to have this new relationship which is important to me, and not to hurt him too much in the process. Its a very difficult situation, and id wondered if anyone else managed this.
By the way, i think i probably or could be polyamorous, ive never really felt monogamus. I am quite inspired by the possibilities when the communication is so open and honest.