Originally Posted by Mohegan
Maybe he is a serial cheater. But I think it is more that to him sex is sex and love is love and they do not need to meet. We have been discussing a poly lifestyle for yrs. But it seems like everytime I get to a point of trusting him and being okay with it, I find out he cheated.
Wait now.... If he is able to separate sex from love then I would be reticent to suggest continuing to find a poly relationship. Poly people, for the most part, and as far as I have seen, seem to mix the two. Otherwise they are swingers no? Perhaps some swinging is in order? You could go along and watch him enjoy himself and get his needs met and not have to have another woman in his life at all.
I have a friend who has a boyfriend like that. He likes to have sex with women, but doesn't seem all that interested in having any kind of loving relationship of substance with them. My friend has a primary common law husband that she lives with and has a life with also. It seems to work for them as her husband has a disability and is not very social. She loves being at home with him... but she calls on her social boyfriend to do things out in the community, such as SM events etc. He gets some personal closeness with her and sex too, and loves her, but he is free to go to swingers parties... and have casual sex with pretty much whomever he takes a fancy too.
Perhaps your hubby would suit an arrangement similar to this in the way that you would make it your own.