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Old 05-11-2010, 05:49 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,872

I just have to say being repeatedly cheated on is not going to be a confidence builder. Quite the opposite.

In my relationship, I feel like anytime my husband looks to friends for advice or to help with a situation, without coming to me, that it is a blow to my confidence.
Why would this be a blow? This isn't a bad thing, perspective is a good thing, friends are a good thing.

sometimes items are easier to discuss with friends, their opinion is less biased (ideally) and more general. Remember opinions are about perspective, if he is looking for opinions on something you and he are involved in, he might naturally realize that talking to someone outside the box is good ...

I guess I think the only way I am confident in something is to be the best at the thing in my group of peers.
This philosophy is dangerous. There will always be someone better at something. You need to accept that. Confidence cannot be based on the impossible Pick a series of things you like about yourself, that you are good at, and focus on those for confidence. Accept weakness in other areas and take heart with the knowledge that you are trying to be better at the things you are best at.
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