I did tell her. I mentioned that here:
I told her today, letting her know that I knew I was springing it on her out of nowhere and that I would understand if she wanted to stop speaking to me. She said she would never want to stop talking to me. I'm not sure what this means for us exactly... neither one of us is willing to travel to meet the other one, it seems. But I'd be content with talking online or on the phone, like we do now, anyway.
But I don't see any reason to tell him, unless she wants to pursue this. In the meantime, I'm going to find a professional that won't make me feel like I'm wrong for having these feelings.