Originally Posted by Zenchild
once you've opened your heart and mind, you're poly?
See - you just know. Or you could walk my road of ignorance and repression and pretend you are not for thirty years and see what kind of havoc that wreaks with your life and your psyche.
In your position I would struggle with the idea that I was expected to give up the new love. I think you might regret that the rest of your days. Okay so in an ideal world we'd all know ourselves so well we'd lay our polyamity out before any new love before making any commitment but who knows about that at 18 or 20? I know I didn't.
I want to say, about the no-sex thing. It's only a friends-only relationship if you don't WANT sex. If you do want to, but choose not to for conventional or compassionate reasons (eg to help a mono partner), it's still a polyamerous relationship, primarily because you are in love rather than just lust.
I have no evidence, but it is my belief that if you aren't interested in sex, you aren't in love.
Hey, thanks for sharing and thanks for all the other posts. It's so great to be here at last.