love is not a competition. The confusion about what "love" is, is an unbalance linguistics issue. English is the most simplified version of latin, ever, and yet it's far more versatile. What that means is, it's easy to use, universally, but limited to certain definitions. Hence the confining word of "love" which is far more complicated than one word.
Saying "I love you" is kind of like saying, "I see electricity
". Electricity is a phenomenon so large, that our entire lives are immersed in it, and barely anyone really knows that. Research it if you will. Love is the same way...The Dichotomy of love is SO HUGE, it would be more prudent to say it's "the phenomenon of love". I could write an article on love right here...but i'm not. In any case, love has multiple parts, so when you're saying, "it's all the same" or "it's all different", what you're really talking about is a quantitative measurement that IS measurable, but that's only a PART of what love is. A core part of love is static and never changing. You should know that part well...
1. Ensure you're wife you will always want to be with her, share your life her, support her, love her, and really everything you feel about her. She needs to "get it". So the fact that you're in this tricky situation and she still feels insecure says that it's your job to pound in her heart & soul that your relationships is LOCKED, AND AWESOME. i'm so serious. Think of it like the media or tv. They pound commercials in your brain so much, you probably BOUNTY papers towels are a decent quality, Taco Bell is delicious, and nothing bad things happen around the world because of the news. Be a love commercial running 24/7(besides the time you're with your other
2. You should have them meet. If you think you're g/f is amazing, there is probably a few - a lot of things your wife can like as well. Have the meet, go out with them, LIGHTLY encourage both of them to hang out, and just get them communicating. It's helps alot.