Yes, I can understand how you feel!! I just "came out" to myself as poly recently (within the last several months) although it seems that I had been setting things up for years to get to this lifestyle.
It's an emotional ride, though. The happiness of "coming out" is incredible but the disappointment when a lover doesn't want to participate is difficult. Feeling judged is something I am dealing with now.
Keep posting and reading....an be patient !!
Good luck and hope to hear more!!
The key to life is in being fully engaged and peacefully detached simultaneously and authentically in each moment.