Thanks for the replies- it's nice to have people who understand!
So if I know it's irrational, I know I am overthinking- do I still let them know how I am feeling? From reading much on the forum I see that open communication is constantly stressed, but are there exceptions to that rule? Do I share with them as I try to let go, or since it's my own past issues, do I deal with it quietly and not make waves?
Thanks again for your thoughtful responses