Originally Posted by EugenePoet
I'm a secondary and my poly GF is very sweet about this issue. When I talk about meeting a particular woman and needing to manage the friendship so that no one gets unrealistic expectations and hence gets hurt, she says "Well, Don, but you can't control your feelings. If you fall in love with her you can't just shut that down." So what she's saying is, if I fall in love with someone else she will understand. Of course she is a rare gem
but really I think many poly people have that kind of understanding.
Don't burn your bridges before you even cross them! Good luck.
I think this is well said !
Although it's NOT always the case (because of inexperience etc), one hopes that people who have done some serious work studying poly concepts and have made a conscious choice to live that life are somewhat better prepared for the realities involved.
Better, more open communication
The acknowledged going in that shit can happen.
Emotions ARE involved.
Like jumping into water we don't know the depth of. We know there's risk involved. We MAY get busted up some. We may not. But if we do, it may not hurt less, but we're likely to heal faster. It was an informed choice we made.