Good for you, starting a blog for mono partners of poly people. You're right, we are probably too harsh here on monos who are afraid of loss, and need lots of rules when first opening a relationship.
After all, I unschooled my kids, child led curriculum, but I had sympathy for people who were also homeschooling, but needed set curriculums they purchased from companies, and set times for school, work books, time off, vacations. Some of them lessened their structures over time as they began to trust the homeschooling process, and trusting their kids to be eager to learn, with or without a set format for the day. Some don't relax the structure, and that's OK for them, though it does make them a family we probably would not have hung out with much.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place. --Shaw
me: Mags, female, pansexual, 59, loving and living with
miss pixi, female, pansexual, 37