Thanks for linking to that article, saudade... solid wisdom, and very useful. Even though I'm not struggling with jealousy at the moment, I'm sure I will at some point, and that gives a really good framework for dealing with it.
Trying, it's nice to hear the other side. I guess the "out of sight, out of mind" thing makes sense. My feelings are kind of the opposite... I feel a bit threatened when I think about him meeting some hypothetical new woman, but when I think about him developing a relationship with an actual person that I know something about, I'm happy with it. For me, the more "real" the other person is, the more clearly I can see that she gives him things that I can't, just like I give things that she can't, and I feel secure in my place. That's a big part of why I'm so eager to meet the other woman. But I guess I'll just have to see what happens.