Originally Posted by london
Hmm, I guess that it surprises me that you wouldn't immediately understand that an adult living under the circumstances she is in would be under a considerable amount of stress. Enough stress to influence her behaviour in all aspects of her interactions, decisions making, etc. That's just obvious to me and others, it seems. But it wasn't obvious to you. That's what leads me to believe that there is probably other areas where you underestimate or dismiss her needs.
I think it is easy to miss things when a person is very stressed. I imagine that the OP probably feels that since this situation was forced upon her, that her personal space was invaded. May make it a little more difficult to see how the newcomer feels than in ordinary circumstances.
-Me: 51, female, relationship anarchist
-The Philosopher: semi-LDR, 44, male - my intellectual twin; relationship anarchist.
-Intellectual Elf, 27, female, the Philosopher's LDR
-Polkadot, 36, dating the Philosopher
-Wiseman, 68, male, solo-poly, my budding LDR