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Old 06-13-2014, 06:21 PM
london london is offline
Join Date: May 2013
Location: UK - land of the free
Posts: 1,635

Originally Posted by Rachelina View Post
What about my post shows I'm unable to put myself in her shoes? I just admitted that space is more of an issue than I had thought. Whenever there's conflict each side usually has trouble seeing the other's perspective. I make a real effort to do so; I am not perfect at it but certainly no worse than the average person.

But although space is a serious issue it's not the only one. There are mental health issues, and just a lot of grief that all this is happening. Accepting their relationship was very painful to me in the beginning, but then becoming close friends with her compensated for the pain even though it was still there. Now it's all pain, no benefit. At least that's how it seems. I need to work on acceptance and seeing that there are benefits, even if they're mostly for my boy.

Thanks for the ideas GalaGirl!
Hmm, I guess that it surprises me that you wouldn't immediately understand that an adult living under the circumstances she is in would be under a considerable amount of stress. Enough stress to influence her behaviour in all aspects of her interactions, decisions making, etc. That's just obvious to me and others, it seems. But it wasn't obvious to you. That's what leads me to believe that there is probably other areas where you underestimate or dismiss her needs.
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