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Old 06-09-2014, 03:36 PM
opalescent opalescent is offline
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: US
Posts: 2,097


This is an old pattern. You and your girlfriend agree to some boundaries, she keeps to them for a while, and then when they don't match with what she wants to do, she does what she really wants to do anyway. And the boundary breaking usually has something to do with what another partner and is often sex-related. (If you have skepticism about this, reread your earlier posts.)

At this point, she has shown you repeatedly who she really is. She will keep an agreement until she doesn't. She will take your needs into account until they conflict with something else she wants to do.

The question isn't her fertility. It's if you can thrive in this relationship. She's not going to change. Can you accept her as she is? Manage the risks she presents to you? (I'm not just talking physical but emotional and mental as well.) To date, you'e chosen to work things out, to cope. There is nothing wrong with this choice. If you can see and accept her for who she is, and get most of your needs met in this relationship, then that is a good choice for you.

She's not someone who is trustworthy in the usual sense - as someone who keeps their word and does what they say will do. Do you get enough out of this relationship to stay, and to accept that any boundaries (particularly sexual) set will be broken sooner or later?
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