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Old 04-17-2010, 05:39 PM
ak2381 ak2381 is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Charleston, WV
Posts: 119
Default Intimidated

So husband and J have this whole dom/sub thing with their relationship. It is a big thrill for the both of them. I had asked him awhile ago that I would like him to give me some of this excitement to me as well. I felt like I got the boring sex and time and she got the fun nights.
Now let me explain that I use to do things for husband awhile ago that kind of stopped over time. And she picked them up naturally now. She and I are surprisingly similar. I use to call him sir to be playful and show my respect of his role as my husband and provider. But he didn't like that so I stopped. I used to wear cute thongs and garter belts and g-strings and things like taht under my clothes. But as time went on and our marriage slowly started going downhill I gradually stopped. He use to call me Angel and that stopped as the years went by.
Now she calls him sir. He loves it. She never knew I use to call him that. It just happened. She wears that stuff now, not knowing again I use to do that, just knowing he likes that stuff. He calls her Kitten because of a little choker she wears. He just now started calling me Angel again because of that so I didn't feel so inferior and less important. I do appreciate his efforts.
So he does what I ask and brings home some of the excitement of BDSM and the whole dom lifestyle. We are purely in bedroom with that stuff. I know some make it a full lifestyle but outside the bedroom we don't so we can show our daughter that we are equals and I am not less than he is.
Through bringing home the dom/sub life he has asked me to call him sir in the bedroom and wear the garters and such again. I do as I am asked because that comes with it. But I almost feel like a copycat, a second thought. He knows these are my worries and tries to reassure me that this is simply because it is something he likes, not because he is trying to make a carbon copy of J. I understand this but it feels wierd and I have a hard time not picturing them when he does this. I guess time will give me what I need and I will get use to doing this stuff again. After all I had it once a long time ago and lost it. It isn't her fault she does it now instead of me. I should have never let this go. I was a little upset about the sir thing since he told me he didn't like it and then a few years later got a thrill when she did it.
What can I do though. Another discomfort to work through. Someday I will work through them all right?
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