Thread: Sailing Solo
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Old 05-23-2014, 11:11 PM
Atlantis Atlantis is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: USA
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Kip has been chatting away on IM, just like old times. Apparently I should have listened when he said he was overworked and stressed, because that seems to have been the case. I think I can see him on Monday if the ex takes the kids for a few hours.

Things are very good with Joe. He hid his OKC profile and I was a bit shocked. We were trying to work out the date of first meeting and I went online to look it up, and he was not there. Said he doesn't want to date anyone else. Oh dear. I couldn't really get into the discussion as Minijoe was in the room. It was a one-sided statement of exclusive dating. I hadn't logged into my account in ages as I changed the password with the hacking concerns of a while ago, and then promptly forgot the new one, so was unaware of this. Hmm. Suppose we need to discuss this. I have really just been enjoying the NRE and the sex has really improved, and haven't wanted to discuss relationships.

Prof. There have been 2 discussions on relationship status there, but not too much in the sense of where I stand.
He told me last week he had made changes to his OKC profile. I was a bit surprised and asked him what he was looking for in a relationship going forward. He said he had no idea but was waiting for normal to return. There was something about he "valued my friendship," I said I wasn't asking about me I just curious about in general. He brought up the topic, not me.
I checked out his profile changes, and it was just very sad. I don't know why he would bother, I would just hide my profile for a while, but I suppose we deal with grief in different ways. He is contemplating taking the summer off from one job, I think that might be healthy.
Fast forward to last night, I was joking about letting me get the tip for dinner, or he would dump me, long standing joke, and he said that Ms. Philly had dumped him today. Ms. Philly was the woman from Xmas who he wanted to do the 3way with. He showed me the text and gave me the back story. She had asked him a couple of months ago to be his primary and apparently he made it loud and clear in a restaurant, much to her embarrassment, that that was not going to happen. She wants to get married, go monogamous, have kids and live "the white-picket dream." His kids have graduated college, no way is going down that path again. So she decided that if that wasn't possible then she was done with him. So that sparked more talk about his dating future. Seems awfully rushed considering how recently Ms Text passed, but he wants to talk about so I am letting him.

He asked me if I wanted to be "primary". I said how about you rethink the hierarchical model entirely. He kind if agreed and pointed out that the previous rules are no longer valid and he is free to do what he wants. He did he is also say he is rethinking the whole open relationship model. He did ask me what I wanted and I said nothing different but if you do get a primary then please don't do the rules thing again because I won't stick around for it. I said the rules were unkind and he agreed.
So I kind of side-stepped answering the primary question. I think things are fine as they are and I would not want to become part of the model that I found quite distasteful. I think it would require some kind of paradigm shift from Prof. Bottom line is, I don't want anything much different.

He invited me and the munchkins to his street BBQ on Monday. Meet the neighbours and all that. Eek socializing with strangers, I did try to politely decline but he said the kids would love it as they block the street off and there are other kids their age to play with. Couldn't really refuse in the face of that logic, plus no cooking for me.
New Year's Resolution 2014, be more sociable with strangers. It will not be next year's resolution for sure.
__________________
Me: mid 40s female. currently in a monogamous partnership with;
Mr Dom: late 40s. 1 year.
Prof: recently ended open relationship.

Last edited by Atlantis; 05-23-2014 at 11:15 PM.
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