when things go awry
Well, I talked with *him* about strengthening our relationship and then opening it up to other people and well, it did not fly. I have developed feelings for him, and him not for me. I don’t think he is really polyamorous, actually. I think he just wants multiple people to have sex with. This is a total bummer to me. I put myself out there, and allowed myself to be vulnerable and the sky fell on me. Now, I am more convinced than ever that I am polyamorous, and now truly alone once again – loving many, but none here to share the experience with me.
A part of me would like to continue the sexual relationship with him, and a part of me is over it and would like for my life to go back to what it was before. I would definitely miss those fun times with him, and am disappointed about the possibility of not having the future to fulfill so many of our “plans”. I wish we could go back to the way things were before.
I have no regrets for opening up my heart, however. It feels great to love.
What are you to do when things go awry??