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Old 05-19-2014, 09:10 PM
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Marcus Marcus is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2012
Location: Portland, OR
Posts: 1,587

Originally Posted by gorgeouskitten View Post
I thought it was how my brains wired too...but now im thinking, maybe only sexually. Its the multiples loves tripping me up.
Defining philosophies and worldviews can change, for some of us they change dramatically several times throughout our lives. Who knows, maybe the idea of poly was right on target for you when you were in that emotional place and you have found yourself in another and need to reassess.

I wouldn't read much into it but that... you are in a place of self-evaluation.

Originally Posted by gorgeouskitten View Post
lately every poly couple I know is splitting up. My poly therapist is getting divorced, my friend who was such a big support and a swinger doesn't want to swing anymore after getting so jealous at her hubs last outing, my boyfriends marriage fell apart....honestly the list goes on. Im not sure I can/want to do this anymore.
I don't see one thing having anything to do with another. It sounds like you are having doubts about wanting a poly association and are using the fact that you know of other non-monogamous relationships that are also not working as support for your doubts. I suggest focusing on what is or is not working for *you* and leave the relationships of the world to their own devices.

My experience is that relationships don't last for a lifetime. Mono relationships don't, and poly relationships don't. I suppose it's possible that someone meets another person, becomes romantic with them, and they miraculously grow in perfect unison throughout their entire existence and never break up or have to change the nature of their association fundamentally... but I'm not using that as a "common" example lol
Me: male, 43, straight, non-hierarchical, independent
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