Originally Posted by Marcus
1. His family is xenophobic and he capitulates to their irrational fears.
2. You are not turned off by the fact that he allows his parents to dictate his life for him.
What you have described is really just another example demonstrating that there is some emotional growth that needs to take place before this association will even risk being a healthy relationship.
I wish you luck, I really do.
I appreciate that Marcus. My family would wholeheartedly agree with you. That he is allowing his family to run his life in this way. He is a grown man.
But, I also understand his viewpoint in that he loves his family and does not want to disown them because of their simple-mindedness.
We have broken up numerous times because of this exact reason, but, have a longing to be together.
Healthy or not, I will not hold him accountable for his family's racist behavior. I will also not give him another ultimatum to choose between me or his family. I feel the situation we have created, now with Jason providing the "Family" that I am looking for, while still being able to maintain my love for Michael, might just be the answer.
It might not be, and I might be totally messing up my life, along with everyone else's in the end. I have never said I have this all figured out. In fact, I know I do not. I am just trying to survive here, and be happy.
Michael is an amazingly awesome guy. If you didn't get mad at him for enabling his family's behavior, people instantly fall for his character, kindness, gentleness. I do love him. This situation enables me to also fully be happy. I don't know the rules...