Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat
I don't disagree, however it can be difficult to distinguish between a personal view and a professional opinion. If someone has been in business for a long time and never ever seen a certain configuration work, it's not irrational to conclude that the configuration is fundamentally flawed. Problem is, you still have to be open minded to the possibility that you just haven't seen it yet, not that it's impossible.
I agree with this. My point wasn't so much that the counselor should *feel* objective as that if they aren't able to be objective in their mind, they should at least keep their negative, non-objective reaction to themselves in the interests of being supportive of their client. If they feel the client is doing something detrimental, they could phrase it in terms of the client rather than judging the concept as a whole; saying "Are you sure that type of relationship is the best choice for you?" gets the point across without sounding as harsh and judgy as "Polyamory never works, you're going to have a horrible time, what are you thinking?"
ETA: London, that's also a very good point, but if Jade's counselor actually said "Polyamory never works", it's a bit different situation to the counselor saying "I don't think polyamory would work for you."
Me: 43, cis-het female, poly
Hubby: my husband, 41, monogamous
Guy: my LDR boyfriend, 42, rebukes all labels
Last edited by KC43; 04-22-2014 at 11:31 AM.