a lil help
First off, thanks for being the supportive group that you are!
So here goes, I've recently wound up in a relationship with a girl in which we are incredibly in love with each other. Previously, I had been very fed up with feeling trapped in my mono relationships. The girl also has a strong aversion to monogamy. We both agree that monogamy is usually unhealthy and often destined for failure for all the reasons that you are all very aware of. So we both want our relationship to be as open as possible.
Here is the problem: I can't shake the fact that I don't feel good about her being with other people. It's not a question of me not wanting this kind of relationship or not wanting her to be happy. It's also not a question of whether or not I'm in touch with what causes me to feel this way. I know that a lot of it comes from deep fears and insecurities of inadequacy and ultimately of being left. I really do hate that I feel this way but I cannot help it. It's at times excruciating.
What to do...?