Thank you all so much. It's been so hard trying to balance my capacity to love others with their capacity to reject me for that very ability to love. No wonder this world is full of so many lonely people.
I have no intention of acting on these feelings just yet. Right now getting through this pregnancy and the first few months of our new child's life is first and foremost and that's enough of an adjustment in itself. But I intend to stick with the boards here in the hope that, if and when we're ready to open our hearts to someone new, my mind will also have opened up to accepting myself for it.